July 31, 2016
The lists abound. We have lists of things to do before our baby comes; things to pack, things to remember, things to do immediately after he's here, and many more. Just as quickly as we are checking things off of our list, more things take their place. Some are as simple as chores that require more time than what we will have once our little one arrives, while others are projects that have to be completed or things that need to be purchased. So much has already been accomplished and the final big hurdle for us will be Evelyn's birthday parties before we can truly stop and breathe.
In the midst of the preparations, I'm trying to keep my chin up and pull through the rest of this pregnancy. I'm finding that so very hard to do as everything aches and things that used to be simple are ten times more difficult than they used to be. I know that this is a short time and that it will seem like a passing moment when I look back once our baby boy is here. While this pregnancy feels like it's gone by quickly simply due to the busyness of life, there are moments where it seems as though it will never end.
So many days, I wake up feeling as though I just need to get through the day. Just endure and get one day closer to delivering this boy and being able to move on with the rest of our lives. One day closer to being able to stand up or walk a flight of stairs without finding myself in utter misery. And yet even as my body aches from the cumulative effect of four pregnancies, I know that there are women who would kill to be in my shoes right now and that reminder puts me back in my place. It makes it easier to silence my complaints and remind myself that each day isn't something to simply "make it through," but a gift. Another day with my family, with my three children that are already here, another day to spend with my unborn son. It's something to be grateful for, not something to look at with dread, no matter how tempting.
So in the midst of these preparations and the abundance of lists, I'm trying to remember to be thankful. With only a few more weeks to go, these days are precious, even while they are challenging. I'm snuggling my babies a little extra and trying to make time to spend with each of them to feel special, knowing how my time will be monopolized shortly. And somehow, through it all, hopefully we'll find the time and energy to finish up those endless lists.