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August 2, 2011

Ten Points to the Incubator

Over the weekend, I had the pleasure of having my latest pregnancy suspicions confirmed- people really have no clue how to talk to an expectant bundle of hormones. While out shopping with my little sister, I encountered a lovely middle-aged woman who really deserved a roundhouse kick to the face. In my current condition, however, that might just be pushing the limits of my flexibility. Plus, I don't particularly crave giving birth from a jail cell. So instead, I'm settling for the opportunity to share our conversation with all of you.

Middle-Aged Woman: Excuse me, are you having a baby?

Me: Yes.

Middle-Aged Woman: Aw. Is it twins? [Smiles knowingly]

Me: [Losing my smile] Nope. Just one in there.

Middle-Aged Woman: Oh wow. Really?! Well... that's going to be a big kid!

Me: Actually, I'm a lot smaller than I was with my first baby.

Middle-Aged Woman: Oh.

Before she could dig herself in any deeper and before I had the chance to give into all of the less-than-savory things running through my mind at that point, I turned around and walked away. And for not saying all of the things that were on the top of my tongue that afternoon, I am awarding myself an extra ten points.

Oh, and those points? I plan on redeeming them for some progress toward labor.


  1. That was the absolute worst!! I hate that question!

  2. I totally feel for you. I've been having similar conversations and they seem to just get worse and worse..probably as I become more annoyed. What is so difficult about speaking to pregnant women? I don't get it!

  3. If only I knew! Pregnant women are people too- just try to be polite to us and kindly don't remind us how huge we are!

  4. Oh Alyssa.....You are beautiful! It might seem ancient history to you to think about us "old" moms being pregnant. However, hearing vivid descriptions of your current state of affairs brings me immediately back to that time in my own life. It's really such a unique and wondrous time. It stands alone in its own category of experiences as it is incomparable to anything. There is little to nothing anybody could say to help you feel better esp. when the way you feel could change in 5 min. :). But let me remind you...YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL! Wonderfully designed by God who knew full well what He was doing when He created you! Really truly, seeing your pictures is living proof of the miracle of life and the awesome privilege we get to bring forth life. Keeping you close in my prayers knowing deliverance is eminent.

  5. I hear stories like this all the time from my pregnant friends and all I can think is that I am going to be the bitchiest pregnant chick EVER because I would never be able to hold back if someone said that to me! I cannot get over how clueless and rude people are sometimes. You deserve 20 bonus points in my opinion. :)

    You look great and I'm rootin' for you and baby!

  6. I'm thinking that baby can just walk on out for you . . . people have NO idea ;)

  7. Erin, I'm completely on board with that plan. SIGN ME UP!