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April 21, 2010

They Call Me Peachy

Airplane is a dangerous game. You know, the game where you hold a baby on his tummy while running around your house making buzzing noises. Ironically, Nathaniel seems to like this game, despite the fact that he hates tummy time. Which probably means that he inherited his mama's love of amusement park rides. The faster, the better. (Incidentally, the world's largest indoor triple-loop roller coaster is in Canada. Go there. Ride it.)

We play airplane on a regular basis in our house. And it usually precludes a diaper change or bedtime. And so when Nathaniel dirtied his sixth diaper this morning, we got up from the kitchen and were zooming into the bedroom at mach 4.

Which was when the corner of the wall jumped out at me.

Let's be clear about this: my shoulder didn't hit the wall. I was viciously and ferociously attacked as Nathaniel flew past the entryway to the kitchen. It was a premeditated attempt on my life and I will be taking a sledgehammer to that corner shortly.

After I stumbled into Nathaniel's room, I plopped him down on the changing table and half-collapsed onto the floor (keeping one hand up on the babe to prevent a roll off the pad... though it would be nothing short of a miracle if he graces the world with a roll). And after I decided I wasn't going to pass out, I pulled myself up and slapped clean diaper number 7 onto my son's bottom.

And once the babe went down for a nap, I took a minute to survey the damage in the bathroom mirror. Currently, there is a big red spot on the back of my shoulder which will shortly be evolving into a rainbow of black and blue splotches. Oh the fun of bruising like a peach.

Now, where is my sledgehammer?

1 comment:

  1. My motherly instinct makes me want to jump in my car and fly to your rescue and comfort! I'm so sorry your wall attacked you! Walls become unruly sometimes when they feel neglected, though yours have no excuse since you recently treated them to a fresh coat of paint. Rather than beating them with a sledge hammer, I might suggest "singing!" I know it sounds crazy, but homes with walls that are filled with song are 75% more content. In any case, you have my sincere sympathy for your injury (although better you than Nathaniel!). And, I'm sorry that you bruise so got that from me.