April 1, 2010

Guest Blog: Hormonal Imbalances meets Adventures of the Stay At Home Mom

I have to admit, I've been a huge fan of Diana's from our days back on the Bump (when we were both sporting some pretty significant baby bellies) to the time when I discovered her blog, Hormonal Imbalances. (Which is nothing short of awesome, by the way. Plus, she has baby pictures of Bella... who is GORGEOUS.) So when I asked her to guest blog and she said yes, I quickly tapped out an email telling her how excited I was to have her write for all of you (that is, after I stopped dancing around my kitchen in glee). So, for your enjoyment, here is Diana...

When Alyssa asked me to guest blog for her, I was thrilled. She was a few weeks behind me on The Bump in her pregnancy, and I can remember when I was on bed rest reading about her rough time too. We left messages for each other occasionally, and comments on each other’s posts. After I had Bella, I didn’t go on there much anymore, and I started my blog. I kept seeing “Adventures of a Stay at Home Mom” on Top Mommy Blogs, and I even read some of her writing, but it never clicked that this was Alyssa’s blog. One day I went on the Bump to find out what had happened to her, and on her profile found her blog. I’m so glad I did, I have another cloth diapering, SAHM to chat with now, and Alyssa is a doll.

I’ve read many of her posts and one that stood out was “You Unzipped Your Pants Too.” I almost choked on my breakfast reading that someone could have the gall to say that to a new mom. Or about their own daughter. So I thought, “We all have these little comments during pregnancy and after that irk us, I’ll share mine.”

My mom and I wandered downtown one day where she lives. It’s basically a street of high end clothing and retail shops, and feeling special at 20 weeks pregnant, I decided to splurge in a bedding/bath one. We (because I can justify anything to myself) needed new bath towels and floor rugs.

At this point, I was noticeably pregnant. But I loved my new shape and was proud to finally fill out my maternity clothes. I liked people being able to ask me about when I was due without the hesitation of, “Maybe she’s just got some kind of extra bulge/smuggling a small melon/likes beer.”

The owner asked if we had purchased any baby items yet, and then showed us that she had several organic mattresses and crib sheets in stock if we might be interested. I was, but we didn’t have a crib yet. We got to talking about her daughter who had just had her first baby and how excited she was to be a grandma. She was pleasant, and my mom and her chatted on grandkids.

After wrapping things up, we left. I had such a nice experience I decided to go back and look at that mattress on more time. This was just a few weeks later, and the owner was in that day as well. She remembered me, and then said, “How far along are you now?” I told her 21/22 weeks, and she stared at me in horror.

“Lord, you’re huge!” she cried. “My daughter was just this itty bitty pregnant thing. Are you having twins?” I’d like to say this is where I promptly throat punched her to the ground, but instead I stood there in complete shock and my mom piped up, “She’s fine, completely normal. Everyone carries a baby differently.”

The owner shook her head and said, “You’re just a big girl.” I was really mad at this point, so I started to put back the things I had been considering purchasing. She asked if she could help me find anything and I shook my head. She then quipped, “I don’t carry a lot of baby products, most people who are expecting can’t afford my things anyway.” I was dumbfounded, I had just dropped a bit of my hard earned money in her store the previous week and she was telling me that I couldn’t afford her items? Sure, I couldn’t afford her $1,000 bed sheets, but I wasn’t in the poorhouse.

My mom and I left in a hurry after that. My image of a cute pregnant lady had changed a little, what she had said I couldn’t shake completely. I never went back, but I eventually realized that everyone views pregnancy differently. I’d have a “You’re so gigantic for being only 7 months!” and a “You’re so tiny!” all in the same day. Beauty truly is in the eye of the beholder, especially when it comes to being a pregnant woman.

I learned to have a tougher skin and let things bounce off of me. And to practice having fast hands - I figure next time, I’ll be a little quicker with my throat punching skills. Word gets around about that, I bet I’ll only have “You’re so tiny” comments for my entire pregnancy.

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